Most of the time, it's great to be a stay at home mom. What other job can I stay in my dirty pj's until 2 pm? Where else can I declare that it's Rainy Movie Day and break out the sleeping bags, popcorn, and Disney Princess movies? It's a good life.
The down side? Right now we have $10 in our checking account. $10! That's it until payday on Friday.
I have enough food, diapers (she still won't use the potty), and everything else I need to survive the next few days. But my gas tank is on empty and I can't afford to fill it. I'm stuck in the house. (Great.)
I am so sick of treading water financially. There is never extra money for dinners at a restaurant, trips to the good mall 45 minutes away, new clothing, or spur of the moment "Wow, I want that!" purchases. I'd love to be able to run out and get a manicure/pedicure like I did pre-married life. I wish I could take $300 and replace my stained, torn, and worn out clothes.
Some days, I feel like the sacrifice is worth it. My daughter is worth living on a budget, right? She's happy, secure, and gets all the one-on-one mommy time I can give her.
Other days...I want to go get an "easier" job. I dream of dropping her off at daycare while I go and earn a nice paycheck--and wear cute outfits and French tip acrylics.
Does it make me a bad mom to admit that I want to climb into bed, pull the covers over my head, and not wake up again until payday? I'm a broke mommy, and I don't want to park my running-on-fumes car and sit here for the next 4 days. I'm going to be in a nasty, depressive funk before Friday. I hate roaming around this house aimlessly, watching the hours tick slowly by.
Do you know how I feel? Any other SAHM's just scrapping by? How do you handle it?
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2 hours ago
18 comments:
If it makes you feel any better, I had $9 until last night when I just had to stop at sonic on my way to work. Now I have $5. I live for paydays, not sure why. Since I just pay bills and end up right where I was at before. Porbably the only thing that keeps me sain is going to my part time evening job. At least it is something to do, and I am not sitting at home 24 hours a day. It gets me out of the house, and provides a little quiet time. Now when it comes to tax time, I feel stupid for having my little part-time job, but I don't have the nerve to quit. Especially since it was my full time one before kids. I keep thinking one day things will be better, but that one day just hasn't come yet. So until then, I will continue to be creative.
Isn't that the truth..
There is never enough money, and, it's the only thing we fight about in our house.
I'm a saver and my spouse is a SPENDER.
My dilema right now is rather I should go to work or stay home and Mom.
Don't you wish you could be paid by the word for your blog?
If it makes you feel any better, my husband and I both work full-time and most weeks we are also counting down the days until payday...
I hate that financially strapped feeling!!
Jaci-I know exactly how you feel! I have done a variety of things to bring in money while I stay at home. Thursday I am starting a training pants study on my youngest. Free pull-ups for 3 weeks and $70 at the end...We do what we have to. I am just grateful I have my part-time teaching job in the evenings, and it pays twice a month. My hubby gets paid once a month which can make things interesting...
I am a former public school teacher and my husband is a current public school teacher. How we afford for me to stay home and Mom is beyond me. I let him take care of all the bills for now so I can be in denial. Otherwise I would go crazy with worry.
Too bad Tyra doesn't fork over some of that $138K shes always saying SAHMs are worth. Or maybe just a makeover would be nice...
Okay everyone, I just emailed Tyra. I'll let you know which day she wants us to appear on her show.
Whew! It's nice to know I'm not alone. Tyra better come through for us mommies...and she better not call our jobs "fierce". :)
Hi there, I could have written your post. I am a SAHM and my husband and I live the endless cycle of work to live, live to work. It drives us crazy. I don't know if I really 'handle' it. Usually I 'handle' it by taking a trip to Starbucks, which obviously isn't helping the situation...I just tell myself that it won't always be like this (and I hope I am not just living in denial).
while i'm not a "real" sahm, i totally know what you're talking about. there have been days, that have turned into WEEKS of doing nothing. all. day. long.
however, i have tried to find ways that don't cost as much money, and mostly what i do is call up friends and have them come over, or we go over there... simple enough, but it seriously makes a huge difference. i almost find it easier to have other kids over here because then i know the kids are happy and I don't have to be entertaining them all the time!
While I'm not a SAHM, I totally hear ya on the putting the covers over your head thing! Especially when it comes to money issues. I just try to remember to breathe and it'll all be alright :) but there definitely never seems to be enough moo-lah.
Jaci, do you hear that sound? It's me, gasping for air, warding off the panic attack that your post caused! I'm approaching SAHM-dom in exactly 45 days, not that I'm counting.
I wish I had something clever to say, but right now I'm just trying to be proactive and figure out how to handle sharing the household money!
I'm not sure how long you've been a SAHM, but I can tell you that that feeling never totally goes away. At least for me it doesn't. When I first started staying at home there were periods where I felt like a lazy cow who wasn't contributing anything to the finances, the family, myself even. I had difficulties finding self worth as a SAHM knowing that most women my age were choosing the other option.
That being said, I take pride in staying at home now (I've been a SAHM for 6+ years) and giving my girls as much of me (and a good upbringing) that I can. I have found ways to fulfill my desire to be productive. I make sure I give myself "me" time on a daily basis. Every once in a while the self worth issue will creep in, but then I find something else to do.
As for finances, I read a blog written by a woman whose family went from a debt-filled to debt-free life and are now living with cash only (no credit). I'm not saying that you guys are in the same situation at all, but she's very resourceful at being frugal and is encouraging at the same time. The Happy Housewife.
absolutely! I try and try to keep a little cushion but anytime I get some, BAM, car breaks down or kid chips a tooth... I wish there was a SAHM government payment system, like unemployment. hey, miracles happen, right?
great blog, I love finding new blogs!
You are not alone. My Hubby's paycheck comes in, bills go out and we are broke again until the following payday.
I recently became a SAHM but only on the condition I could find something that brought in a little additional income. I started watching a neighbor's baby 2 days a week and some days it gets overwhelming. But hey, when you need the cash, you do what you gotta do!
Hang in there!
I am sure you are not the only one to feel this way!
I lost my job in December, a week before Christmas and we decided that I would stay home. I was going to once we had a baby anyway, so we tightened the purse strings while I collected umemployment. Now that that is over and my severance is gone...I don't go anywhere unless I have to and most days do mope around until it's time for bed. I'm training now for a work-from-home job and I'm hoping once the $ starts coming in from that I will get out the house more. Because if I mope until the baby comes I will be certifiable by then!
i have .88 cents.......and no job......I feel you all
I can sooo relate...I just gave my kids an old camcorder to play with...they are having a blast making movies...Of course I don't have any good solutions...I am counting the days till they are back in school, and I do not have to entertain them...I'm worn out and tire...and need a vacation...
You've been paid...YAY! Just wanted to say that if I lived nearby and not on the other side of the world, I would totally have been over at your place this week to do something really fun with you. In the meantime sending happy vibes and loving the posts! Oh, yeah that's right...ebay! I'm not consistent enough about it but I have made a bit of cash that way. Will try find your email somewhere to tell you more if you are interested...
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